¶ Short of the Day #37: The News Hasn't Happened Yet #1

[Perception de Ambiguity]

"Short of the Day" is the daily discussion of a short.

Tasks:
1) Watch.
2) Discuss.
3) Send me your suggestions for the next Short of the Day per PM, along with links to the shorts and comments, questions for the other users to think about, and/or info about the short.

Detailed project introduction: here

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The News Hasn't Happened Yet #1 (David Firth, 2017)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KUD26D7dJX0
Length: 2 minutes 48 seconds

Suggested by: Carmel1379


David Firth put his face on some news footage. Here it is. His latest (and more are to come soon^^). There’s nothing to say about this one, in the aeon of so much transmitted news spread like a plague, Firth’s short film is the only remaining vestige of sensible thought to be found and that's a FACT.

Comments by: Carmel1379

[Carmel1379]

David Firth put his face on some news footage (...) that's a FACT.

Comments by: Carmel1379

'Carmel1379 did not say that.'

'It were just made up, wan't it? He didn't even say that.'

'These lies are being made up by the media. There is no record of him saying that.'

[Perception de Ambiguity]

"King of Europe Andy Tavern twittered that Camel1973 is in fact his own iCM account", says @realKingEuropeYoBitches.

"If we can't trust the king anymore maybe we should vote another one or move back to the Earth, ja?", says the Queen of Moon-Austria.

"I like Camels!", a little boy with turtles make-up tells our reporter while lighting himself a cigarette.

[Carmel1379]

IDIOT SCIENCE GETS IT WRONG - A new study shows Camels prevent cancer.

"I knew it all along." says working-class jCM user to the PPC. "Those posh bastards just want to keep them all to themselves. That's why they cost 10 bloody quid per pack. I have a whole family that needs some smoking for fuck's sake. Think of the children!"

Alice Asswipe from PCP reports that Andork Tolkern twitted with @realKingEuropeYoBitches "people on iCN should comment more or their forum will be sold to the moon people".

[Perception de Ambiguity]

When Alice Asswipe was asked to specify the problem she refused to name it, saying that "if I name it then children will only make fun of it". We are still trying to determine what Asswipe meant by that because most of us don't understand the reference.

"These lies are being made up by the media. Families are a rumor.", jKN user Mario Gorbacovic told our foreign correspondent in a field in Serbia while putting a raw potato into his mouth when he thought that nobody was looking. "I have certainly never felt the warmth and comfort of a family. Have you?" We can not argue with this reasoning.

Camels banned from everywhere forever! Idiot scientists are currently combing the desert for rogue camels. We will keep our viewers updated on further developments.

[Carmel1379]

The Cannes film festival is going great, but raw potatoes are short in supply. Agriculture expert Jeffrey Bowelmovement explains:

"Low potato yield was discovered by idiots combing the desert. They said they were looking for camels, but only found Camels."

The idiots were shortly executed, because Camels are banned everywhere forever. Conspiracy theories have shortly linked the presence of Camels to the lack of raw potatoes. Serbian citizens are outraged. iKM member Luigi Gorbachev expressed his protest: "All those first-world countries just think they can plant their Camels on our deserts and get away with it! I won't let them get in the way of my daily nutrition!"

"Are Camels sentient" is the next big question on everyone's mouth. We will keep our viewers updated on further developments.

[Armoreska]

the 2nd installment is in!/out! dont be slow to not unsee. or do, if you know not what's good for you:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ojts9GFSsdc

[Perception de Ambiguity]

I was too slow to not unsee. Firth pulled both videos.

Sorry I have deleted my new video. It was age restricted on youtube. I'm not working that hard to make no money.

https://twitter.com/DAVID_FIRTH/status/ ... 3220744195

[Carmel1379]

He set up a Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/davidfirth

and it's quite an entertaining read.

[Perception de Ambiguity]

Andrew Tolvern hasn't died...again:



No further news yet, in other words no sign of the infamous part 2 so far.

[Carmel1379]

His patreon video.

[Perception de Ambiguity]

Few others would dare to appeal so shamelessly to people's selfishness, using the "you could give the money to a homeless person but unlike me he won't give you anything in return" argument. Nice one, Firth.

[Carmel1379]

Few others would dare to appeal so shamelessly to people's selfishness, using the "you could give the money to a homeless person but unlike me he won't give you anything in return" argument. Nice one, Firth.

Can you spare some cutter, me brother?




"Then there was like a sea of dirty, smelly old men trying to get at your humble Narrator, with their feeble rookers and horny old claws. It was Old Age having a go at Youth and I daren't do a single solitary thing, O my brothers, it being better to be hit at like that, than want to be sick and feel that horrible pain."

[Carmel1379]

"After 6 years of splitting, stretching and firing distorted particles at one another, we finally have a product: Cream"

"The time has come for CREAM - the latest product that will fix your life."



IMDb iCM

[Carmel1379]

Part 2 is NOT back up again bitchez, ceci n'est pas une video de David Firth:

[Carmel1379]

[Carmel1379]

[Carmel1379]